The Diary of a Contemporary Indian Girl

You may call me a idealistic feminist or a masochist who is always at odds with the world - or you may just think of me as a perceptive young girl who is passionate about the cause of gender equality and who desperately wants to weed out the age old social bias Indians have against women.

The call is yours!!! I have been perceptive enough to catch the subtle nuances about our sexist society since I have come to better understand how it thinks and operates. Just yesterday- I heard a young Sikh boy cribbing about the fact that his sister is not yet married!!! “I am dying to have the entire floor to myself! She is 28- it’s high time she gets married now!!! ARGHHH”. A couple of months back I heard a story about a couple who were contemplating divorce. Some suggested- “the woman should have a child so that she gets busy and forgets her marital woes” (in my view- get stuck with an added responsibility and thus, dare not contemplate separation). Others simply said the girl would have to bear the brunt, as “it is very hard for a single woman to work and survive in a brutal city like Delhi”. A family friend of ours believes in and strongly preaches the “fact” that “a drinking woman can never manage to keep a household intact”. A Sikh acquaintance of my father was sick worried about his daughter’s relationship with a non-Sikh boy who wasn’t earning well enough to fend for himself. He discussed his woes with his son who suggested – “take away my sister’s rights to our family property and wealth. That way, she will come running back to us”. I have heard stories of young married women belonging to apparently ‘affluent’ and ‘educated’ families being verbally harassed and tortured for not having brought enough money in dowry. I went to a wedding recently and decided to grab a drink for myself at the bar!! Much to my dismay- the bar was flooded with sleazy drunk men who were scornfully gazing at me for having committed the sin of even thinking to consume alcohol.  Men boisterously discuss their exploits and drunken escapades with their buddies which is considered “oh so cool”. On the other hand, women who openly embrace their sexuality are dismissed as ‘sluts’ in social circuits.  

I once heard a young bunch of teenagers discussing that they need to arrange for “women”, besides “alcohol” and good music for their impending trip to Goa. Objectification of women is so frightfully normalized, that sadly most women too, are unable to understand this deeply culturally embedded issue. 

In a society where female goddesses are revered and are considered as symbols of power, where sexuality has been openly celebrated through the Kama sutra or the erotic sculptures of Khajurao, and where some of the great emperors and leaders have held their women in the highest of esteem- this paradigm shift in our social and cultural ethos is indeed very disturbing. Time to put our foot down and pull the plug!! What do you think????????